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  • imago Adelheid Oesch, Thérapeute Imago certifiée

Témoignage d'Adelheid Oesch qui a suivi la Formation clinique de base avec Hedy et Yumi Schleifer.

A Fire Kindling Fire

My experience of Hedy Schleifer as an Instructor in my Clinical Imago Training

Towards the end of my training, Hedy quoted: “Every once in a while someone enters your life and leaves footprints in your soul”. To me, training with Hedy has this unforgettable impact and quality. She awakens and reveals hidden or dormant paths in her students, in the couples who train or do her workshops. A path that will remain a vivid experience, as well as an inner blue print, throughout my personal and professional life.

Hedy has the gift of great Teachers. That is, not only precise knowledge of her trade... as precise as the tools of an eye surgeon.., but also what makes of craft an art, the capacity to transmute matter into spirit, concept into living practice, into contagious inspiration. Laws of marriage becoming songs of love.

Hedy has so integrated every aspect of “Imago Relationship Therapy”: theory, applications, deeper meanings and spiritual implications, that with her, ways of teaching are ways of being One can feel no hard thinking, fears and sweaty preparations.., which are initially the lot of all teachers... the minute she stands amidst her group of students. There is lightness and laughter, wings at her hands, words, feet... So, very fast, you grow wings yourself!

I experienced her teaching as flowing wit instantaneous insight. Insight of my, and our Quest and questions, as students and practitioner’s, but also as human beings, in our personal struggles in relationship. Her level of knowledge, clarity of mind.., blended wit unfailing intuition, carried by her loving enthusiasm and commitment, have been for me a Unique Journey. These qualities of her teaching and personality all in one, have turned my Imago Training into a feasting, rather than an exerting effort. And these are no vain words, for I myself have a pretty long experience of life’s wonders and trials, teachers and trainings... being 63, mother of four, long time divorced, and now transformed into an experienced human growth facilitator, specialized in Voice Dialogue.

Hedy knows well, tat what we do not learn in flesh, bone and blood, in heart, spirit and body, doesn’t hold... cannot be remembered, nor taken, nor received, nor believed, by clients, students, or partners, in any lasting way.... will not be trustworthy in this so difficult art of arts called relationship. As an Instructor, she leads us to a high quality of understanding of what is at stake in relationship, using every bit of example through our interactions as a group. So this became truly for me an experience of remembering in the basic sense, of reassembling and reviving scattered fleshless bones. These bones of broken relationship and around them the flesh of a vibrant alive linkage, this glowing current that makes relationship sacred and blissful above all else.

I not only heard, brilliantly exposed, what I needed to learn of the Imago processes, in order to reach Certification as an Imago Clinical Member. I learned what only the inner fire can transmit... recognition of this same fire in my own heart. Hedy conveyed to me, and to us all I believe, in the measure of our commitment, the feel of our own deep humanity. A learning not only from her, but from everyone present, as well as from my own deeper self... this, I believe, are the ingredients of the great Teacher she is: revealing Inner Wisdom in every Apprentice. It is the art of shedding light.., of kindling the fire of that which yearns to be lived in everyone of us.

The reverse may also be true... a loving committed Student will bring forth the art of teaching in all and everyone he meets. And so these mutual gifts never get lost. They are fruitful and multiply... as the Holy Scripture orders and promises.

Training with Hedy and Yumi, for I cannot separate them in this Venture, was really couple work, in the spiritual… and in the incarnated everyday… sense of the word. The opportunity for deeper consciousness in relationship was constantly called forth by both during the course. Every happening was used in service of a here and now quality of relating, through all manners of exercises, in particular Couple Dialogues and Containment circles. I experienced time and time again, how 1-Iedy excels in leading us students, with tender and playful authority, through the process of mirroring and validating whatever comes up. And this as long as necessary to bring in full expression and understanding... so healing, with mirroring alone, the broken or damaged link of insight and love between two persons. What a relief to discover that disputing, being right... proving the other wrong... insisting in solving year long unsolvable problems by winning the battle.., proves unnecessary! The dissolving of it all by itself... when hearts link again through the process. What great savings in time, failures, sweat and pain!

This I learned and believed, because Hedy threw us, with professional skill and strictness, into the merciless waves of exercising Imago amongst us, and subsequently in our homes and Practices as therapists. But I also learned it, by witnessing in awe, how a couple formed by two persons so eminently diverse from each other as Hedy and Yumi, can not only survive, but become the living proof that... yes... Imago can and does work. This, last but not least, was constantly enriched by the so touching an respect inspiring relationship and collaboration between them. Therapist and Engineer.. Live teaching! They both never hesitated to go first. With deep honesty, risk taking and love, they have illustrated in the group how selfless mirroring flowing tenderness and tolerance are possible, even after decades of marriage... They give a convincing example of the importance of a willingness to expose personal limits and do the work I The work it takes, for two people as different as can be... a 100% turtle minimizer, with a 100% hailstorm maximizer... a 100% man, with a 100% woman... to create, tend, and always clean anew, this sacred space in which they are a couple. A holy space of union, where neither is denying his own uniqueness. This has been to me a fascinating and hope inspiring model. It has also deeply touched me, to see how they supported and enhanced each other in every smallest aspect of relating and teaching, so creating this Credible and incredible School for relationship.

Training with Hedy Schleifer shows now to be a wonderful enrichment in my personal life and in my work. To me Hedy Schleifer is all I can wish for in a Teacher: knowledge, professional expertise, experience of life, and what is more rare. . . the generosity to share it... the flame to pass it on... the gift to ignite it in others.

With love and gratitude

Adelheid Oesch

Lausanne, Switzerland, July 28th 2003